Upcoming Movie Roundup - July

In June I saw Godzilla: King of Monsters as a roll-over from May. It wasn't good but I wasn't super disappointed either. (Review here!) Then I saw The Dead Don't Die and that one wasn't awesome either... same kind of deal. But in this case I'm at least glad I saw it! (Review here!) We talked about going to Dark Phoenix but it never happened and I'd still like to see Yesterday. It'll probably be streaming for them both.

This month I'm definitely going to one, but otherwise it seems like a kinda slow month, especially for July. I guess a lot of the movies just aren't my cup of tea. As you will see, there's one in particular that I wouldn't go see even if I was paid, and no, it's not the terrifying horror film.

What looks good to y'all this summer?


Spider-Man: Far From Home
In theaters July 2nd; PG-13
I already have my tickets and I love me some Spider-Man, but at the same time, after Endgame I've been enjoying feeling free of the MCU, and I'm more than a little worried that this one will attempt to draw me back in for the next thing and the next thing. I just want to enjoy some Spidey stuff with Tom Holland, Zendaya, and Jake Gyllenhaal, and have a good self-contained time like I do with non-franchise movies. I know that's too much to ask for, but I'll do my best to enjoy everything I possibly can!




Midsommar
In theaters July 3rd; R
After my experience with Hereditary, this new one from the same director just gonna be a plain, flat no for me. Even if it does have Will Poulter in it. And even if it does look pretty. And even if I do have a slight affinity for cults in horror movies. It's just not worth the risk...




Crawl
In theaters July 12th; R
Wow my brother's gonna be so excited to hear about this movie! (The one who isn't a Marvel fan for anyone who's keeping track.) This movie is a disaster pic, AND a monster flick AND a kinda-sorta horror-thriller, all smashed into one! And it promises to be wonderfully unrealistic and over the top. How nice of them. Starring Kaya Scodelario and Barry Pepper, too! I love Barry Pepper.




The Art of Self-Defense
Limited release on July 12th; R
A strange looking movie in which Jesse Eisenberg is a wimp and decides to learn karate for self-defense. Then things go a little too far? Also with Imogen Poots. The trailer makes me laugh. It kinda makes me think of a more hardcore Napoleon Dynamite with the class Kip takes in that movie -- except way less clean content-wise. I'll probably wait for streaming, but look forward to the day.




The Lion King
In theaters July 19th; PG
A big, fat NO. An even bigger no than Midsommar is. I don't care how nice it looks, or how real it looks, or how great at singing Beyoncé and Donald Glover are, or that James Earl Jones is back. The Lion King was a favorite of mine as a kid. I still love the movie and it's my favorite Broadway show. There is no way on Earth that I'm watching this film. I saw The Jungle Book remake and it made me want to die. I'm not doing it. I've already run out of the theater to avoid watching the trailer again and I will continue to avoid every glimpse of it until the day it's dated and forgotten. I doubt it'll be a long wait.




Once Upon a Time in Hollywood
In theaters July 26th; NR
Looks like a fun time but I've never really loved any of Quentin Tarantino's films so I can't say I'm super excited. I don't know much about film during the late 60's either, so it being about real people probably won't land as well with me as with others, though it does make for a very appealing tone! I'm sure it's very good, just not sure it'll be worth a theater trip for me. (Language warning for the trailer.)




Skin
Limited release July 26th; R
I think this could be a good film if it accurately shows what life is like for white supremacists. Culturally they're kind of this disembodied thing, and movies don't help much by simplifying and Hollywood-izing them as just people who have beer bellies and wear red hats. In reality it's a scary ideology, and the first step to combating it is to understand it. Know your enemy and stuff. This is a true story about a neo-nazi who tried to get out of the life. Jamie Bell and A24. Sounds serious, but promising.




The Mountian
Limited release on July 26th; NR
This looks like such a strange movie, and I have no idea if I want to watch it or not, but it does have Jeff Goldblum and Tye Sheridan in it, so I'll definitely consider it should it even cross my path on a streaming service. It's set in the 50's in a mental asylum.